TW:swerslide mention,enbys,gay heartache,cussing
My partner left me a week ago and I reacted in a childish way I tried to say sorry but I dont know if they fully forgive me. God I miss them so much I would do anything to just speak with them um sorry anyway last night I said that below and I shouldnt have said anything. Please any advice im not sure what to do I wish I just kept my mouth shut.
Me: “Firstly kai I need both of us to hate each other so say the most hurtful things you can think of to me. We both know it’s the only way I can move on. Secondly I have to say this before I cant. I hated seeing you look so happy without me. It looks like we didn’t even happen while I cried every single night. I even read your letters and messages when I thought of you. But my gorgeous gray eyes are dried now and I love myseIf more I don’t need anybody else so please if you ever love me again just don’t and leave you know how”.
and they sent an angry message back so I responded back with.
Me: “You may have seen me as just a person you loved but kai you mean the whole universe to me. I have to push you away. I don’t want to let you down again like I have done to everyone else. I love you kai but you don’t want that anymore so my walls have to come up. I have to let my own facade of having a big ego pretend like I don’t care about others. Something happened and I almost killed myself. I don’t want you to have to deal with that”.
